Friday, April 26, 2013

Easy on the eyes


Anonymous said...

VERY easy on the eyes. I don't see much leather in your eyecandy posts. Not your thing? I know that it's a looking only thing for me: fun to watch, maybe not to actually do. Its association with power dynamics between partners is alluring, but the artificial inequality that it creates is a little off putting. Maybe its because I don't know if its the submissive or dominant role that I'm drawn towards.

Would love your input on leather and D&S and how it plays into a relationship where the two members are "equals." Is it roleplay that doesn't reveal anything deeper about the relationship? An innate aspect of the relationship?


OreamnosAmericanus said...

The issue of power between men in dyads is of great interest to me. Hierarchy/rank is constitutive of the male soul. Doing couple counseling for gay men, it's intrinsic to the work, making the alpha-beta dynamic conscious and working with it.

Some of my thoughts here:

OreamnosAmericanus said...

Leather has been my thing, but not for some time. Doesn't really match my age, IMHO. Always liked the look, the feel and the smell. For some, it's just drag. The leather queen is a sad reality. For others, more symbolic and personal.

Organized leather stuff --like all organized stuff, really-- held little appeal. Once transgressive, it is now relentlessly PC. In 2010 they made a wheel-chair bound transsexual Mr. International Leather.

But it does symbolize power in sex and that is something men are always interested in.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Ex. "Submission and Men" is a very moving examination of male-male sexuality and all it entails. Doing some pondering while mowing the lawn, I noted to myself that even in friendships, there is one who tends to lead, another who follows.

There seems to be an inherent tension between the idea that bottoms are emasculated, and that bottoms can retain masculinity. Women can have great sexual power over their male lovers- don't straight men bemoan angering their women and "not getting some"? Isn't the woman technically dominant in that arrangement?

I concur with your thoughts about leather. I really like the look of it, the power it exudes. If my would-be boyfriend wanted to explore it, I wouldn't complain. I think the sticking point has been that videos I have watched with leather often feature sadism and masochism- things I would never want in a relationship. Begging somebody to whip you, taking pleasure in physically striking your partner, is too much for me. The Alpha-Omega dynamic you wrote of?


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