Monday, March 22, 2010
Interview with General Washington, 1781 AD
General Washington, sir. As part of our interview today, as I ask you about the course of the war you are waging against the British, I am also channeling a prediction about the future.
"I do not hold with fortune-telling, sir."
No, wait. This is really strong. Please, just oblige me. Here it is.
You will be victorious in your revolution and the American States will become an independent nation.
"I am gratified. Continue."
When the Republic has endured, not without great sacrifice and difficulty, for almost 235 years, there will be a President who is half African and half White, raised as a Mohammedan but often attending a church which calls for America to be damned because of its White people.
The Speaker of the House of Representatives will be an Italian Catholic female from the land along the Pacific Ocean. And the leader of the majority party in the Congress will be a lawyer from the Western deserts, a man whose religion will be founded on polygamy so that its members can become gods on their own planets one day.
"Do not jest with me, sir."
And together these three will get Congress to pass a law --one that is so large it is bigger than a Bible-- binding on all Americans, that they must all join something like medical benevolent societies or be fined with a tax by the national government, equivalent to a full week's wages.
That's it. That's the vision, sir.
(Washington stands and exits the room.)
Excuse me, sir, General Washington, where are you going?
"To surrender to General Cornwallis."
_________________
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