Those of you who have had the opportunity to read the Socratic dialogues in Plato will be thrilled to know that a new text has been found, but remained buried in the vaults of scholarly publications. It is strikingly, even eerily contemporary. Attention courtesy of my friend jon mills, a native-born alien of the Anglosphere, who is busy trying to repair Western Civilization from deepest darkest Illinois.
The Malarkion: A Newly Discovered Dialogue on Guilt in Western Christendom
Crux (Vol. 24#4; Dec. 1988)
One of the most exciting archæological discoveries of 1987 was the Dumpsteris Mound in southern Crete. Among the ancient scrolls and parchments unearthed is what seems to be an authentic Platonic dialogue. A translation of the Greek is offered here for the first time. -Jonathan Mills
Socrates. Where are you coming from, Malarkion my friend?
Malarkion. From Hebdomaphokê's skybox, Socrates, high over the Stadium.
Socrates. No doubt the surprising fellow was engaging you in discourse while the chariots were racing.
Malarkion. Yes, by Hercules. He asked me if Western church guilt can be taught.
Socrates. What! Didn't he himself know?
Malarkion. No indeed.
Socrates. And did you answer him?
Malarkion. Certainly not. Not only do I not know whether Western church guilt can be taught, I don't even know what it is. And how can I learn what something is, when I have no idea of it at all? For if I chance upon it, how will I recognize it as what I've been looking for?
Socrates. Malarkion, you young rascal. I see you wish to catch me in a contradiction at once. For surely you know that there is no such thing as learning, but only recollection of what one already knows but has forgotten because it all happened so long ago.
Malarkion. What, Socrates? Are we to report this about you in Larissa, that you say learning is actually recollection?
Socrates. Yes, by Hermes. And to prove what I mean, I will show you that you already know what Western church guilt is.
Malarkion. You mean you will teach me what Western church guilt is?
Socrates. Certainly not! I will simply ask questions of you, so that what you say will be what you know already. Now, does Western church guilt exist as something in itself in the realm of pure ideas, or only in a Western churchman?
Malarkion. Clearly, only in a Western churchman.
Socrates. And a Western churchman is usually quite likeable and well-meaning?
Malarkion. Yes.
Socrates. But does a violent self-image sometimes befall him, wherein he identifies with great evils done by his culture, class and gender group in the present, recent past and distant past?
Malarkion. Of course.
Socrates. And as a representative of this group he takes personal responsibility for the important evils in the world, and considers those evils the important things in the world?
Malarkion. Entirely so.
Socrates. Accordingly, does the Western churchman diminish or even deny other groups' responsibility, while emphasizing that of his own group, out of fear of being marginalized on the stage of world significance?
Malarkion. That is clear, by Janus.
Socrates. Then Western church guilt is not shame at all but a covert boastfulness?
Malarkion. Indeed it seems so, Socrates.
Socrates. So one could understand Western church guilt as the spirit of Rudyard Kipling undermined by the self-doubt produced by the West's disasters this century, which removed from him all sense of divine support and cosmic blessing; with the result that only in an unfavorable sense he can still see himself as the cause of everything significant happening on earth?
Malarkion. Yes.
Socrates. For he still wishes to see himself and to appear to others as the cause of everything significant happening on earth, even while he affirms * the "decline of the West" and the "end of the Constantinian church"? [*or "scoffs at": text unclear]
Malarkion. Yes he does, by Zeus.
Socrates. Therefore the meaning and purpose he wants to give others is to be his accusers in his guilt and judgment drama?
Malarkion. Certainly.
Socrates. Then would a social theory that credits his culture, class and gender group with great injustices make him feel more significant, or less?
Malarkion. More significant, clearly.
Socrates. Accordingly he will prefer social theories that accuse him?
Malarkion. He will.
Socrates. And might this shadow patriotism and moral colonization of non-Western peoples be called by Freud a combination of death wish and infantile omnipotence fantasy?
Malarkion. It might.
Socrates. And does his self-image as the evil protagonist of the world stage expose him to the danger of making his own guilt his leading theological principle?
Malarkion. It does.
Socrates. In which case the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob becomes valet to his bad conscience, with the vocation of constantly reassuring him of his importance in the world by denouncing Western injustices?
Malarkion. Clearly.
Socrates. Then could the Western churchman's moral narcissism impair his understanding both of Christian faith and of human society?
Malarkion. Indeed it could, by Dionysos.
Socrates. And does he hold nineteenth-century Christian liberals in contempt because they believed in progress and failed to perceive the reality of evil in Western culture?
Malarkion. Of course.
Socrates. Yet he continues to see the churches' mission to be the call for social progress, though now this call goes forth primarily as condemnation of the evil in Western culture?
Malarkion. Apparently so.
Socrates. Well now, friend Malarkion, what seems to be the case with our discourse?
Malarkion. It seems, Socrates, that I have indeed known all along what Western church guilt is.
Socrates. For I addressed you only in questions to remind you of what you knew already?
Malarkion. Yes.
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