Tuesday, March 06, 2007

My homosexuality cured by fiat

My mom, now in her early 80's, a bright woman with a college degree, who is very much aware of her surroundings, recently astonished me by announcing that I was not really gay. I was, as you may imagine, taken aback, and asked what she meant by that. She said, "You're not (then mouthing the word silently) homosexual. " I expressed incomprehension. She refused to explain. "End of discussion", was what she said. And left the room.

So, the last three decades plus of my life have now been revealed as an enormous prank. My ex, who ought to know, was puzzled. "Who did she think you were to me," he asked, "my parole officer?"

I told a friend, with whom I spent all of yesterday afternoon, of this astounding development. And considering how I spent all of yesterday afternoon with him , it is astounding indeed! He re-framed it very well. "Just think", he offered, "now all us men you've slept with can brag that we managed to seduce this very hot straight dude."

Well, if you look at it that way....;-)

PS. Does childbirth make women insane?

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